So far so good. It’s strange when it’s good. So used to things being so bad. When it’s good it confuses me. I don’t really know how to appreciate the good. I always feel like there’s got to be something bad going on. There’s nothing bad right now though, not one thing. That realization is making it hard to just be happy. I don’t know why. It shouldn’t be this way but it is and I’m noticing it as the days go by. I got nothing to complain about but I sure am searching for something. Search all I want I can’t find anything. I feel as though that much has become evident to me. As this becomes evident I slowly am able to appreciate the day as it’s handed to me. Today, today I’m happy.
And maybe that’s the real challenge—allowing yourself to be happy without needing a reason to fight against it. You’ve been wired for struggle, conditioned to brace for impact, always waiting for the next thing to go wrong. But nothing is wrong. For once, everything is just… good.
It’s uncomfortable, isn’t it? This feeling of ease, of stillness. It almost feels unnatural after everything you’ve been through. But that’s just because you’re not used to it—not because you don’t deserve it. You do.
So let go of the need to search for problems where none exist. Stop scanning the horizon for storms when the sun is shining right in front of you. Just for today, let yourself have this moment. No guilt, no worry, no hesitation. Just happiness, exactly as it is.
