The return to reality is strange. Sleep has become a dead space for your non-existence. Every day you wake is a day worth all of your life. Today is all there is to you. Not even today, it boils down to the minute. At this very moment, that’s life.
Worries, contemplations, they mean little to you. What others may or may not say about what you do or don’t do is not running through the simulation in your mind anymore. You just go on and do what you were going to do without any added judgement to it. It really is something else to be able to see the world this way. Though the tax of seeing it this way is the need to fill every minute of it.
Wasted minutes poison you in this state of awareness. Poison in the form of self harm. Not physically, though training does become that much more taxing on the body. I mean so more mentally hurt yourself.
The things you contemplate over to fill the empty minutes you fail to fill work for the sole purpose of weighing you down. They want to keep you where you are.
Suffocation is evident in every missed minute.
Whether you do it or not (achieve your goals) you will suffocate.
Don’t do it and watch how the weight of empty space eats at you little by little. Until there is nothing left of you.
Do it and watch how you can’t stop. You now have to continue forward or the weight of being “done” comes over you. Being done takes away the purpose you created for yourself. Leaving you again with empty space. You can never be done or you’ll question the reason for even existing anymore.
This is your life now.
You must accept your demands for this life you are trying to build and work every single day you are walking on this Earth to inch yourself closer to that life you seek.
When you get there, create new goals. Don’t stop. Reach for higher heights.
A person dies when they no longer want anything in life. The hunger to get it is what kept you alive in your encounter with the void.
You could of died, you could of ceased to be. Yet you fought hard against something so overwhelmingly stronger than you, giving you new found strength.
Why did you fight again?
It was because you haven’t yet finished what you said you would do. Your desire to win and your love for this life made you walk towards the edge and move past it.
You in it now. Even as your writing this. As you sit in your car at work and use up company time for your own personal writing time.
The day requires YOU.
It needs you to be there. All of you.
My contingency do you not remember?
“In exchange for truths, give me your presence throughout the entirety of your day and there I will give you the answers you seek.”
Do you feel it now?
Is this how you thought it would feel to be all there?
OR is there more of you that you can give?
If there isn’t any more to give, can you give more anyway?
If you manage to do so, and wake up the next day to find you need to do it again can you?
Trespass into the domain of the infinite, see the world anew. See limits shattered. Make home of the void, make it your own.
